Wednesday 19 September 2012

Evolving with love: Letting go of stale beliefs

Today I was upset to hear the Australian government has voted against same-sex marriage, and it got me thinking about love, equality and evolution.

What is the one thing human beings agree on?


Our desire for love and our ability to love is universal. Even the hardened criminal has the capacity to love (it was probably a lack of love that made them turn to crime in the first place). We are all capable of loving others and of loving ourselves.

Where things go wrong is when we limit who we love. We allow ourselves to love our family members, our partners, our children, and our closest friends. But some of us stop there. We create a bubble of love that extends only to those we know personally and we ignore everyone else. This is where we let ourselves down as human beings. This is where understanding and compassion get lost in a sea of hatred, discrimination and fear.

Imagine for a second if we loved each and every person on the planet in the same way we love our own family and friends. Would we then go to war to kill those we love? Would we make choices that leave our loved ones homeless or without food? Would we deny our loved ones basic human rights because of their gender, or their race, or their sexuality?

Of course we wouldn’t. We would want the best for our loved ones. We would want them to be happy and safe and loved. We would want them to enjoy all the beauty life has to offer. After all, isn’t that what we want for ourselves already? Why wouldn’t we choose that for others?

To me this is what we do when our governments give marriage rights to heterosexual couples but not to homosexual couples - we are choosing to limit other people. We are saying to them – ‘your life and your choices are not as important as mine.’ We are telling them – ‘the love you feel for your partner is not as valid as the love I feel for mine.’ 

Think about marriage for a second. What is marriage? Is it not the union of two loving people who are choosing to commit to one another and share their lives together? That’s how I view marriage, so in my mind the union of marriage should be available to ANY two people who choose it. That’s what it’s all about – choice. To take away a person’s right to make their own choices means you have stopped loving them. Simple as that. Love no longer exists when we limit each other.

But it’s not all bad! :-) The human race is still evolving. It’s the miracle of life; our ability to free ourselves from shackles of the past, to see the error of our ways. When things are no longer working, or have become outdated, we can change them. We invent new ways of doing things that align with our new beliefs and needs. It’s what happened when we freed the slaves, or gave women the right to vote. And that’s where our views on marriage are right now – in transition. In the past marriage was a union based on property then it became a union based on procreation. Now marriage is a union based on love. And therein lies the answer. Every human being deserves love and every human being desires love. If a couple want to express that love by getting married then that is their right as loving human beings, regardless of sexuality.

I believe our governments will see the light of day eventually. Until then let’s remember one thing - love is a gift we can choose to bestow. So let’s choose to love one another wholeheartedly.

1 comment:

  1. Well said, lady! It was a sad day for our country indeed yesterday. On a slightly positive note, however, they published the list of yays and nays online this morning. There were a few names on the yay list which I didn't expect, which was encouraging. Hopefully those people will now be more vocal in getting this act passed. In the meantime, let's hope Tasmania will succeed where Canberra has failed.